Well that didn’t take long

So here’s the scoop peeps…

I want another baby. 

Isn’t that just flipping out of this world crazy? And I don’t mean I want to trade in the Hollster and get another one. I mean I want an additional one. As in a THIRD child.

What the actual fuck? 

I don’t even understand it to be honest. One minute I’m moaning about the pain in my vagina and declaring no human will ever exit my loins ever again and the next I feel deep in my bones that I want to have one more baby at some point. I just feel like there is another soul out there for us, apparently.

This baby, you know the one I had only 8 weeks ago, is actually doing really great at the moment so I think that is part of it. After my last post she kind of self corrected those night sleeps so I think it must have been the 6 week growth spurt. And bless her heart she is getting better and better at being put down and sleeping on her own. She still catnaps in the day the little upstart but I really feel like things are improving. And even without all the sleeps I would like she is sooooooo happy. I think that’s what is going on. She is melting my heart with her happiness and giggles. I mean, seriously, CHECK HER OUT:

So at 8 weeks young we are pretty much on 4 feeds a day (3-4 hourly feed cycle)  and 2 overnight (1130ish and 330ish). She is a pretty efficient little feeder so her feeds don’t last all that long so it doesn’t seem too taxing at all. 

Of course it is not always like this. We have only been on this cycle this past almost week which is ages in baby land but not really that longand sometimes I do top her feeds up during the day. I just follow her cues and do what I think she needs. Sometimes I fuck it up, sometimes I get it right and the longer we go on our little journey together the better I feel I am getting at reading her. Now I have said that though she will go down a totally different path just to screw with me as that’s what babies seem to do!

Anyway I am not planning on doing the baby thing in the immediate future. In fact I am turning Eric down more often than not as I am scared of some weird voodoo where all of a sudden I fall pregnant at the drop of a hat (and before even getting my period back because IT HAPPENS people) despite it taking us all most 3 years to get BeeGee (Holly’s new blog name from this point btw). 

I have no intention of going down the full on secondary infertility path again. When the time comes we will go back and have the endo operation again to clear me out but that is all we will do. No more IVF. Just go old fashioned sex. I will most certainly be 40 or even 41 at that point so things just may not happen based on age alone and I’m ok with that. But we will have a little crack at it nonetheless. 
Well maybe. I’m hating on Eric a bit at the moment so I may have chucked his entire worldly possessions on the lawn by then and told him to get lost. Might be a bit hard to have the third baby without him as buggered if I’m starting over all that biz with someone new. Far too complicated. 

Meanwhile I am going to try and find me some reasonable birth control that doesn’t make me craaaaaay-zeeeee. Can’t believe after all we have been through I am thinking about freaking birth control. Just seems wrong. But I’m not sure my mental health would survive a baby in 9 months time. TOO SOON. 

So there you have it, the baby scoop. 

It is official: I am a flipping nutter. 


36 thoughts on “Well that didn’t take long

  1. I can’t believe how animated she is at 8 weeks! That is just amazing! And I literally giggled, because reading the post I was thinking how glad I was that things were working out so well with you and Eric, and how well y’all had adapted to the massive changes in your life… and then I read you were a bit peeved with him… and all of the sudden all was right with the world again! 😀


  2. You’re not crazy! I feel like a lot of people feel this way while they still have a young one. Doesn’t mean you want another one NOW, just that you know you want another. This one isn’t even born yet and I know I want another, so does that make ME crazy!?!? 😛


    • I didn’t have this with baby no 1. I struggled a lot more with him. I think that is why I want another too as I know that subsequent babies don’t feel so hard and I want that experience again. I am just saying I’m crazy as I moaned about the birth and the night feeds last post and said I was done and here I am flipping on that already hehe But a woman’s prerogative is to change her mind, right?? Xx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Awwww BeeGee is the cutest! I love that nickname. I don’t think you’re crazy at all for wanting a third and I say follow your heart! Glad for the update and loving the pictures.


  4. Lol I think I’d be in a similar boat if I had my own personal sperm supply! I’d likely take the ‘if it happens it happens’ stance. I wish for you to have exactly what you dream of! Xx


  5. Omg I feel the same way!! Lol. My husband, on the other hand, said he wanted to wait at least two years to start trying again and I almost lost it, haha. I’m letting it go for now but we will definitely be revisiting this conversation early next year. We had such trouble the first time that I’m NOT trying to prevent anything again. She’s so adorable & I’m glad things are getting better. Btw- I need to comment back but this weekend has been so busy. I’m feeding Savannah right now and she’s kicking me so have to cut it short, lol.


  6. She’s adorable! I’m 28 weeks pregnant with my first and going to be a single parent (long story, some of which I have just ranted about in my blog) so I can’t agree or disagree your nuts yet! lol. But either way you’re clearly doing a fantastic job judging by those smiles!


  7. Hahahaha! Love this post 😄. She is beautiful and looks so cuddly and lovely. There is something about babies… A few times I’ve cautiously allowed myself to think about having another, just to explore my reaction. I’m kind of relieved to discover that I still don’t want more. I do think three is the best number, but I am heavily, oh so heavily biased 😉 xxxxx


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