Far out, I feel like this priming has taken FOREVER. I was so excited to start and the time was zipping on by but then we got to two weeks out and the whole thing felt like it came to a stand still.
I have essentially been visualising a mental calendar seventy squillion times a day for the last two weeks. 12 days to go. Check later that day. Count. Ok so 12 days to go. And repeat. I am slowly sending myself MAD. It’s a self created fucking 2WW. What sort of idiot puts themselves into that? Oh me. Yes, that would be me. ANYWAY.
Officially AF is due tomorrow which means clinic on Thursday for bloods and baseline scan (very exciting – my old clinic didn’t do the baseline stuff!) and needles on Friday. Of course because I WANT AF to be perfectly on time she will probably be out partying and forget her curfew and rock up late which terrifies me deep down but I’m trying to act cool about it so I don’t lose the plot completely.
The main reason it terrifies me is that fucking clinics here don’t do anything on the weekends so if AF rocks up Friday for example I can’t get into the clinic for baseline stuff until DAY 4 and who wants to start something you are paying thousands of dollars for late. I want perfect conditions dammit. But there isn’t much I can do to change things if that’s the way it is going to go so I’m doing my best to roll with it and hope it is all peachy.
I have set up a session with my Fertility Coach this Thursday so that should help with keeping my shit together.
I gotta say – AF does not feel like she will be rocking up tomorrow at all. No signs whatsoever of her but then it was like that last month too. I just went into the loo one morning and WOAH. Sorry, that was probably TMI. I am wondering if the tube flush is the reason for that (the no signs, not the TMI, right).
To all the dudes reading my blog – I apologise. This must be tough going sometimes.
I didn’t do a health challenge update this week. I lost focus last week. Ate something off the naughty list about 5 days out of the 7, put on 400grams. Nice. I have my focus back now to a degree and stims will keep me on the straight and narrow so all good. I’m not worried. I do think I need carbs so I’m going to look at carb cycling in the long term and basically eating more potato that isn’t in hot chip form. Ha.
That’s about it from this part of the world. Hope it’s all honky tonk where you are. I’ll report back in a few days with stories about poking myself with needles. Wooohoo!