Haggered, Horny and Huge: This is me on IVF

Before you start IVF you wonder a lot about how it will effect you. Will the hormones make you crazy? Will you breeze on through? Will you produce lots of eggs or hardly any eggs? Will you hate the needles and cry through them every day? Or will it just plain suck?

Well, it’s no picnic, let me tell you but it’s not completely hideous either. As my Dr says, it is amazing what you will put up with when the end goal is a baby.

We are now at CD 14 of IVF #1 and I can sum up my experience in 3 words: Haggered, Horny and Huge.

So much FUN.

The haggered kicked in on Thursday. I was so freaking tired it was debilitating. We went out for playgroup in the morning and it was all I could do not to fall asleep standing up. And converse with other grown ups? Man, you’ve got to be kidding me. I fell off the sugar wagon that day as I was just so blah which  was stupid really. If there is ever a day I should be eating all my vitamins it is one where I lack energy but, you know, I never said I was SANE.

As for the horny, my god. I have never experienced the feeling of being bone dead tired and still wanting to bonk. If you are a parent yourself you will know that NEVER happens. I remember my pre-parent days fondly, naively thinking that sex is something I would never turn down from my husband. The reality is that I don’t turn it down, I just fall asleep before it can get started. And if you wake me for sex? Far out, I turn into a venomous snake. I almost spit I’m so furious. Sleep is a precious commodity around these parts. Do not steal it from me.

Anyway, so my body has other ideas it the moment. It has going on 20 follicles in there now rip roaring and read to be fertilised any day now so despite the fact that I’m so tired I feel I need to crawl everywhere my body is screaming “fertilise me” at the tops of its nerve endings. If you are curious apparently you are allowed to have sex during the IVF process however it does need to be protected. Imagine shooting a load of sperm into an area with 20 fresh eggs???? You’d make Octomum look like she had an easy ride. So we’ve been skipping the sex and taking it easy.

Last but not least, I feel as least sexy as ever as I am currently waddling like I’m 15 weeks pregnant. Given that my body now has essentially two bunches of grapes hanging around in there I feel like I am leading with my ovaries when I walk. You meet them first, my 20 potential babies.

So this is me and IVF. I am hoping with everything I have that many of these eggs are mature and fertilise when they get out so I don’t have to do this again any time soon. It is draining.

On that note, my scan on Friday went really well. Follicles are looking great and Dr thinks I may get as many as 10 eggs each side. They weren’t quite as big as he hoped though so they have put me back to Tuesday for egg collection. This is all booked in now and confirmed. No more checking. We’ve locked it in, Eddie (only Australian’s will get that game show reference).

I have my last stim needles this morning – YAY – then my trigger tonight. I also have to trot off to a collection centre miles away this morning (it is Sunday and the only one that is open) and have my blood drawn to check my progesterone. Apparently they need to see progesterone levels before I do the trigger shot as if it is too high then they will freeze all the embryos rather than implant a fresh one this cycle. Apparently this isn’t a common problem but a possibility that needs to be checked. Another hurdle…it’s a hurdle heavy race.

Monday is NEEDLE FREE – thank fucking christ. It will be nice to have a bit of a normal day – well as normal as I can with 20 eggs bulging out of my abdominal area sucking the life out of me. Funnily enough this whole process has reminded me of how early pregnancy feels so let’s hope I get to feel this way again soon. HA!

And that’s it. That takes us to egg collection. See you post procedure with my numbers.

~Ems~

 

 

 

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10 thoughts on “Haggered, Horny and Huge: This is me on IVF

  1. I felt exactly the same! To a T. I think the exhaustion leads to the sugar wagon. I had the same thing happen. I’m glad to hear you’re doing so well! I’m stoked to see you cross that finish line! I have very high hopes for you Miss Maine! 😉 have a great weekend and needle free Monday! Xx

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  2. If procreation was solely dependent on men, mankind would dwindle away and die. Of this I’m certain. Good on ya for going “above and beyond”. Super positive vibes continue to be sent your way. xoxo

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  3. Woop, woop! At least you are keeping your sense of humor, right? I was cracking up while reading. I’m sorry you are feeling mega uncomfortable, but excited for you that you retrieval is SO CLOSE. Can’t wait to hear how it goes!

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    • hehe glad you were amused. It was supposed to poke a bit of a stick at the whole process and make people smile so glad I achieved that. Today is EGG COLLECTION DAY. I’m really excited. Eeeeep. Hope you are doing OK.

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